If you ever want to see what a circus is really like, then by all means don't pass up the opportunity to attend one of the many UFO or other alternative conferences that take place across the United States. A lot of these conferences are truly an eye opener. I've been to a few conferences, or 'cons' as they are known. 'Cons'...aptly named in my opinion, because that's just what they are as far as I'm concerned. While all were quite an experience, I'll never make the mistake of going to another.

You can get anything at these conferences, so long as you're willing to fork out the cash for not only admission into the show, but for audio cassettes, videos, CD Roms, DVDs, t-shirts, UFO coffee mugs, alien repelling devices, UFO detectors, UFO buttons, UFO ties, UFO posters, UFO coasters, UFO ashtrays, alien alarm clocks, alien traps, alien jewelry...you get the point.

One UFO conference I attended actually had two guys dressed up in alien costumes with big alien heads running around hugging people. It's interesting going to these conferences since I'm a big unknown in this field, so I've been able to walk around and talk to people without any problems and the conversations never stopped when I was around.

At one 'con' in particular, I was privy to a conversation with some researchers that referred to Whitley Strieber as "Witless" several times. One of these researchers now works closely with Strieber, though I think he wouldn't have the nerve to call Strieber "Witless" to his face much less his foot (yes, that is a hint). Speaking of Strieber...

Whitley Strieber came up to me later and just started talking to me about how the Associated Press was suppressing UFO stories sent over the wire - I didn't so much as breath in Strieber's direction and have no idea what prompted the conversation. That isn't to say that the conversation wasn't interesting, it was just odd how it came about. He must have talked to me for a solid hour. All I can say about Strieber is that he's a nice enough guy, but catching someone on the fly you've never met and the first thing to come out of your mouth is conspiracy, conspiracy, conspiracy...well, that might not be the best way to greet someone.

Jaime Maussan (pictured left) did the same thing, he just stopped and started telling me some wild tale of how stars in the night sky were moving their positions. In fact, they weren't stars at all but gigantic UFO motherships. He went on about the massive sightings in Mexico and how he had a very special video that would be coming out soon - ala the Mexico Daytime UFO Hoax. Jaime didn't skip a beat and talked about UFOs colliding with airliners and the military getting into dogfights with UFOs. Evidence of all this? Well, that was another story and Maussan seems to suffer from a permanent deficiency when it comes to actually providing evidence of his many, many claims (see the Reed UFO Fraud). Speaking of those seriously lacking in the evidence department...

At one conference, I witnessed a UFO researcher completely trashing Sean David Morton to a group of people. That stopped when Morton came over and said hello to that person, they both hugged each other like long lost friends and asked how the other was doing. Morton, dressed in an 80s Miami Vice jacket, boots with at least a 4 inch lift, and a medallion of such size around his neck that it would surely cause anyone back problems, was as loud as they get and he made sure everyone within a one mile radius knew he was there. Morton left and the trash talking resumed. This is the same Sean David Morton that avoided my many questions about him by simply turning around and walking away. When the tough questions came up, he suddenly didn't have time, but sure as hell had plenty time to flap his yap when he was trying to hawk his newsletter to me.

I talked to a UFO vendor selling video tapes - he made it clear he was there for the money and nothing else. "I just do this on the side," the vendor told me. I got a similar response from someone else selling books. Of course, the conference promoters charge an arm and a leg for the vendors to set up their tables or booths. The price for a vendor to do business is anywhere from two-hundred dollars on up. Some idiots running these shows even chrge extra if your table or booth required electricity!

Among other things, I witnessed someone get stiffed for a dinner bill by a presenter. I know, because I was the someone that got stuck with the tab. I got my money back, only after an argument that resulted in my promise to accept someone's blood as payment if they couldn't produce the cash they tried to rip me off for. Someone I met later on claimed the 'world's foremost UFO researcher' had stiffed them for a hefty dinner for three. I wasn't surprised.

I got to see a group of alleged abductees have a sudden "implant attack." They made quite a scene leaving in the middle of someone's presentation, one of them appeared to be laughing and it came off as nothing short of a low grade stunt - though one would later decalre it as proof of his abduction with "witnesses" to boot.

A lot of people were networking, talking about that alleged next big movie, TV or book deal they had in the works at the 'cons' I went to. People telling other people to make sure and see this guy to buy this, or that guy to buy that. One person who is well known in UFO circles, pointing to a vendor's table, told me, "You should be sure to buy this CD Rom. It's great and you could really use it." I really didn't have much use for a CD Rom loaded with overused and almost cliche pictures of UFOs that anyone can find at the local library or on the Internet. The next day the same guy urging me to buy the CD Rom was talking to the same vendor about a marketing deal for the CD and about producing his own CD.

What is even a larger sign that most of these goons are in this for profit is when you start seeing promoters and/or speakers with a TM or © next to their name. A name copyrighted and /or trade marked? Please. There could be no more obvious sign. Either it's for profit or out of sheer vanity, as many people over-estimate their importance.

I went to a lot of the presentations, and I wasn't at all impressed. Much of the material being shown was the same thing these guys have been selling for years - even material that was proven to be fraudulent was still being sold as the real deal to the gullible idiots that would hand over their cash.

Don't bother asking too many questions either. While the presenters say they will have a 'Q & A' at the end, it really isn't a 'Q & A'. A simple yes or no question will turn in to a 10 minute diatribe about suppression of the truth or some other vast conspiracy designed to divert your attention from what is actually happening. Or worse, goodness me, you get labeled a non-believer or debunker by the presenter for asking for some simple clarification.

While these presenters claim to have the truth and the ability to tell you what is going on, well, what exactly is supposed to be happening is never quite clear and your simple question never gets an answer. They do, of course, tell you the pitch that you can always buy the book and get the answer. Or you can subscribe to their newsletter. Maybe the video or the CD Rom might help you out...for only $19.95. Sean David Morton was actually selling outdated copies of his self-published newsletter for $40.00 a piece...the scary part was that some people were actually buying them.

At another 'con' I attended I met the organizer. This guy was running around like a chicken with his head cut off. He had apparently sold-out two or three presentations for a particular presenter, but the presenter could not make it to the conference. I overheard the organizer, chirrping away on his cell phone (one of the presentations was the dangers of cell phones...no kidding) about how he couldn't afford to give refunds and the presenter "had better find a way to get his ass here. I paid for his God damn ticket!" The outdoor setting in California was rather nice though, but not anywhere near being worth the cost of admission or my travel time.

What I found to be the worst part of these conferences is where you pay the admission price, get to go to a "free" lecture where the speaker hypes you up about the information he/she allegedly has and then they tell you if you want to hear more that you have to attend the workshop after the free lecture. Talk about bait and hook. Of course the workshop isn't included in the general admission price and can range from $20.00 to $45.00 just for a single presentation. Then the speaker will try to sell their books, videos and whatever else they can con you into buying.

Many of these so-called conferences are nothing more than the 'big tent' event trying to get you to shell out your hard earned cash for their performances where the audience 'ooos' and 'ahs'. Of course, there's also the over priced candy (i.e.: videos, books, tapes, etc...) at the concession stands, where a soda will cost you $6.75. When you take a drink you find out you've just shelled out your dough for a luke warm flat soda you could have had for less than a buck. Overall, many of the speakers at these conferences come off more like carnies, those guys at carnivals working booths that try to get you to play their games where you spend $40 to win a $2 stuffed animal. This isn't to say those presenting at or promoting these conferences are ripoff artists, just most of them.

Unfortunately for the people that actually do serious research and investigation, those who have books or other items worth the price, those that actually contribute to the subject, these UFO conferences are often the only venue they have to share their work with the public on any kind of larger and more personal scale. There were a couple of researchers in attendance that were sincere and credible at the 'cons' I attended. These are usually the people that get the least amount of people to attend their lectures. Why let boring facts get in the way when just down the hall some guy is spewing sensationalist crap about the secret alien base under the Giza temple where Atlantis is supposed to buried and where a huge colony of clones is being grown with biological tissue taken from abductees and cattle mutilations...or something like that. Gullibility is what the sensationalist idiots count on.

And don't bother trying to point out to anyone running a conference that some of their speakers may not be the most credible in the world. I tried doing this a couple of times - they're not interested. I sent an e-mail to the Bay Area UFO Expo a few years ago about Sean David Morton and his many, many, many bogus claims. I pointed to the investigation into Morton done by UFOWATCHDOG.COM. The response was an e-mail entitled "Uh-Oh." One of the assistant producers of the expo wrote, "Please be advised that Sean David Morton will be appearing at the Bay Area UFO Expo...You might want to let your listeners know..." (By the way, it's readers, not listeners). This same assistant promoter was selling audio tapes of the speakers and past speakers. Mmmm, wonder what it is that is motivating him...

It's amazing to see that some idiots are still promoting Morton as having credibility, in spite of all facts and common sense to the contrary. They don't seem to really care about 'the truth' they espouse as being so important. Clearly, credibility is not an issue at these 'cons' and those 'con' promoters advocating conspiracies and alleging that the truth is being covered up usually turn out to be the ones doing the covering up by letting bogus speakers in the door, whether it be by choice, omission, sheer stupidity, or greed...guaranteed to be two out of those four reasons every time.

Some would think that a conference organizer or promoter might want to try and make sure that the presenters and their claims were credible. After all, the media does show up at these things on occasion - though it usually turns out to be some late night show wanting a bit piece they can use later, no thanks to the frauds and idiots out there making the UFO subject look completely insane. Again, don't waste your time asking questions - the least you'll get is a trollish response in which you're labeled part of the conspiracy or the person you've contacted says he/she "isn't going to waste any time with it."

But the promoters don't seem to have a problem taking your money and looking to the side at some serious issues that have been raised about the presenters they host, or those presenters that have outright lied about their backgrounds. But don't say anything to the promoters, because really, the truth is just a side issue and they'll have no problem telling you that you should use your time more wisely, for their wisdom does not come cheap and they have much to lose. An example...

A promoter hosts a single speaker event. Said speaker is popular because of his/her wacky views and/or nonsense. Said event admission is $50 per person. Said venue for said event holds 1000 people. Said promoter sells out venue. $50.00 x 1000 = $50,000. Said promoter's overhead is a speaker fee or percentage of the gross ticket sales and cost of venue and advertising. Even if said promoter only nets 30% of the total, then promoter's cut is a cool $15,000.

Let's toss a better one out there - 'Dr.Jonathan Reed' and his bunk alien encounter. This guy sold-out several of his speaking engagements at anywhere from $20 to $40 a pop! At the lowest price of $20 with a crowd of 700, that comes out to be $14,000! Do you think that crook made some money? Do you think some conference promoters had any problem putting him up on a stage and selling tickets no matter how outrageous his story was, no matter how many holes were in it, no matter how it had been discredited as a fraud? Of course not.

And what about those people interested in the subject going to one of these conferences for the first time? Alas, it appears the only thing that any conference organizer or promoter is interested in is the bottom line - the almighty dollar. Don't get me wrong, I completely understand that conferences cost money. But why would anyone claiming to have a sincere interest in the subject jeopardize it at the cost of showcasing idiots, frauds, and fools with nothing to lose and everything to sell? There is no accountability in this field and certainly it appears there is a complete lack of responsibility on behalf of the promoters of these so-called conferences who will shamelesly peddle 'the truth' to you, motivated usually by their own greed and an apparent inability to seek out gainful employment. And what about...oh, never mind, these people can't hear me over their own voices, "...one-hundred......two-hundred...three-hundred..."

Through the eyes of those organizing and/or producing these 'cons', remember this: They have 'the truth', and it can be yours...and they will be more than happy to provide you with it...for a price, of course...