If they only knew how much trouble they were going to cause (slaughtering cattle, abducting people at night, vandalizing farm crops) or what their presence would bring upon the inhabitants of this third rock from the sun (UFO conventions, skeptics, believers, late night radio programs, conspiracies, UFO movies, TV shows, hoaxes, lunatics, debates), I think those aliens might have thought twice and would have done themselves a favor by skipping this miserable part of the galaxy all together. But oh no, those damn aliens wouldn't make things that simple. Why should they, they don't live here after all...right?

No other figure has dominated pop culture such as the image of what has become the standard for what an alien is. No longer is it the green invader from Mars that is imprinted on the human psyche as to what an alien looks like, now its represented by a being with a large, odd shaped head with large almond shaped eyes black as the night, gray colored skin, small child like body - yep, that's an alien. These pesky little invaders, er, space brothers, aliens, whatever you want to call them, that like to walk through walls to pay some folks a nightly visit, or appear in a field to dice up cattle, or to turn a farmer's crop into a large pattern of symbols prompting everyone and their mother to come out and look - they've become an icon in pop culture not just here in the good old United States, but the world over. As recognizable as the Batman logo or Superman's 'S', the gray guys with the big eyes can been seen the world over. A simple drawing in just about any country will get you the same response - "Oh, yeah! The aliens."

The aliens have made the entire UFO field look ridiculous, pro and con of the subject alike. Who would believe some guy, even if he was credible, that some aliens came down and took him aboard their ship? Who would believe that a farming couple watched a couple of aliens take a cow out of their pasture only to find that same cow carved up in some unconventional fashion with certain organs missing and minimal bleeding? Or what about the person claiming the aliens paid them a visit late one night and kidnapped the person for some sort of strange medical procedure that involved the aliens making alien-human hybrids from the reproductive parts of their unwilling human guinea pigs?

What about the person with a gazillion degrees in some technical area that 90% of the population has problems pronouncing let alone spelling or understanding - is he the ultimate authority when he says all talk about aliens being here is ridiculous, unfounded? What about the other guy with a gazillion degrees saying just the opposite? Or better yet, how about the guy that seems to have a mundane answer for every UFO case ever reported, whether he's actually studied/investigated the case or not. Are those aliens devious or what?!

What makes us mere earthlings look all the more ridiculous is that we can't even get a clear picture of one of the little gray dudes when they're out doing whatever it is they're alleged to be doing. When we get some pictures, no matter how sensational they may be, someone always has an answer, plausible or otherwise. We do have some pictures of what are being purported as aliens, we just don't know if they're real or not. Well, some photos we know aren't real...

What would be nice if the aliens would just pose for one clear picture or video. Better yet, how about they get off their asses, make their presence known and end the whole debate about life elsewhere in the universe let alone the UFO issue. Or what about that all controlling evil government that has known about all of this since 1947 when they picked up a UFO and its crew and placed them in a bunch of freezers at some secret room at Wright Patterson Air Force base in Ohio? What about those that have or are serving as President of the United States - surely they must have been briefed all about this highly classified national security matter. The Weekly World News has proven that with stunning evidence...the picture leaves me speechless every time I see it. I don't know about you, but I'm sure John Q. Public is impressed with the quality of alien photographic evidence out there...

To the aliens - thanks for nothing but leaving us with more questions and debate over whether you exist or not, whether you're out there or not. By design or not, indeed, those miserable little life forms have made us all, believer and skeptic alike, look pretty silly. You devilish little bastards...